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Great Sage of the Sea
Posts: 915
| Subject: What I hate , commissary
My bride can no longer push a shopping cart. I have no choice, I must accompany her. I HATE, no “hate“ is too mild. I abhor, utterly detest going to the commissary. She makes out a list, and knows what she needs. Then why in the name of God are you looking, feeling every stinking item in the row? When we get to the meat dept. you would think she is a USDA inspector. There’s only twelve more rows to go. God, please deliver me! And of course she has to discuss the prices of one brand vs another. I don’t care, just put them in the flipping cart. My head is Mount Etna. Smoke curls out my ears. “ Get two cans of green beans off the bottom shelf there hon.” “No, those are french style, get the regular cut beside them.” She inspects the cans. “These are low sodium, get regular ones.” My brain is screaming STIFLE! There is liquid in my mouth which tastes like cooper, and my tongue hurts. A buffalo squeezes by me with one screaming kid, and the other urchin has snot running down his face. Probably touched every item on every row. The PA screams ”clean up on isle 9.
Got there at 7:30. It’s now 1145 and we are out the door, loaded and heading home. “Are you crying” she asks. ”No, just some allergy” I lie. |
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Master and Commander
Posts: 1735
Location: SoCal | Subject: RE: What I hate , commissary
I had no idea people could spend over 4 hours shopping in one store! You re a better man than me! |
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Senior Crew
Posts: 240
Location: San Diego, CA | Subject: RE: What I hate , commissary
Men - We know what we want, go in and get it and be out in 15 minutes
Women - They have to cruise every isle in the store and think about what type of pasta do I need for dinner in two weeks. There are too many choices for their brains to quickly make a decision. |
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COMSUBBBS
Posts: 3907
Location: Kansas City Missouri | Subject: RE: What I hate , commissary
A term I first heard at boot camp and rarely since is "Nuts to Butts, gentlemen, Nuts to Butts"When in line almost anywhere, my mind goes there, and a smile follows. Another was " I don't know but I been told, something, something is mighty cold."
Walmart brings all I desire at My Beckoning (evil laugh)
I once saw a lady smelling different brands of green beans 15 oz cans, another smile. |
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Old Salt
Posts: 317
Location: Vista, Ca. | Subject: RE: What I hate , commissary
Been there, done that. And, not to pick on women, but they act like they can smell a deel a mile off and if they do then they will rarely let you forget it. My wife is constantly telling me Aldi this, Albertsonm's that. I don't care. And it always reminds me of my mother. When I was a teenager, I loved Life cereal. Probably still do just not supposed to have that much milk. At the commissary they were $.33 a box. So she would buy three. I could eat a box at one sitting for breakfast and often did. One dat she found out on Thursday we had no more Life. I thought the roof was falling in. My God for $.33 I had better learn to make that cereal stretch. |
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Admin
Posts: 2398
Location: Renton, WA | Subject: RE: What I hate , commissary
Reads like a Stephen King short story Ian... I could taste the bile welling up in your throat! 
My wife typically does the "big shopping" on Sundays while I watch football. During the week, I do the "eggs and milk" quick-stops at the grocery on my way home from the gym.
Pretty sweet deal.... |
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Master and Commander
Posts: 1522
Location: NE Florida | Subject: RE: What I hate , commissary
How well I know this scenario.
Coyote |
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COMSUBBBS
Posts: 3907
Location: Kansas City Missouri | Subject: RE: What I hate , commissary
geno, buddy,I checked, at todays prices a box of life and a gallon of skim moo juice or go crazy 2%, if consumed before the fall equinox will only result in much needed happiness, and maybe farts, really funny smelling silent come from behind dry....Nevermind.
For the wives
Edited by GaryKC 2026-08-29 7:15 PM
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What I hate , commissary
