Installing Programs

Dear Tech Support , 

Last year I upgraded from  Boyfriend 5.0   to  Husband 1.0   and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under  Boyfriend 5.0 .

In addition,  Husband 1.0   uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as  Romance 9.5  and  Personal Attention 6.5,  and then installed undesirable programs such as :

NBA 5.0, 

NFL  3.0    and 

Golf Clubs 4.1 .

Conversation 8.0   no longer runs, and  Housecleaning 2. 6   simply crashes the system.

 Please note that I have tried running  Nagging 5.3   to fix these problems, but to no avail. 

What can I do? 

Signed, 

Desperate.

DEAR DESPERATE , 

First, keep in mind,   Boyfriend 5.0  is an Entertainment Package, while  Husband 1.0  is an operating system. 

Please enter command:  ithoughtyoulovedme.html   and try to download  Tears 6.2   and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.   If that application works as designed,  Husband 1.0  should then automatically run the applications  Jewelry 2.0  and  Flowers 3.5. 

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause  Husband 1.0   to default to    Grumpy Silence 2.5 ,  Happy  Hour 7.0   or  Beer 6.1 . 

Please note that 

Beer 6.1  is a very bad program that will download the  Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta. 

Whatever you do,  DO NOT   under any circumstances install  Mother-In-Law 1.0  (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system  resources .)  

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the   Boyfriend 5.0-program .These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary,  Husband 1.0  is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional  software to improve memory and performance. We recommend:

Cooking 3.0  and 

Hot Lingerie 7.7. 

Good Luck! 

Tech Support